non sequitur

  1. hate strongly dislike guinea pig exrementious matter on my livingroom carpet.
  2. It is impossible to adequately predict the exponential rate of conversion from delightful squeal to scream that  occurs when: sister wins the race to the only downstairs toilet, sister gets kicked in the shins by brother, and brother gets put on lifetime Ipod restriction.
  3. Rollerskating on basement carpet causes irreversible divots.
  4. An inanimate object caused me to break my toe. I had nothing to do with it.
  5. Heels are not recommended for newly broken toes, even if they are the only brown shoes you have that happen to perfectly compliment your brown suit.
  6. My brown suit is causing me to have an unsunny disposition today.
  7. A brown suit is also an inanimate object.
  8. I suck at speaking French. Even the basics. Thank goodness.
  9. Guinea pig poop looks strikingly similar to the weird pellets and seeds they eat.
  10. But squishier.

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